I can't help but noticing that noone is actually reading this blog. Not really much of an issue for me, truth be told, because it seems that my worst writing is always when I'm blogging. I write good essays, I'm writing a story that most of my friends seem to like... I just can't blog. Maybe it's because I'm so restricted in what I can actually post online, where anyone can read it. Then again, maybe it's because I'm so restricted in what I can bring myself to post online, where anyone can read it.
Somewhat unsurprisingly, my loyal readers (or lack there-of) seem to have handled this problem for me with an unprecedented diligence. I can only hope that my future posts will be better than the previous ones. (I don't mean to insult you, by the way, if you actually DO read my blog. I am merely denying your existence.)
Well, this leaves us with a wide open forum of unexplored landscape. God knows what's going up here next. Let's see what the issues of today are. I'm thinking....... ok I really am thinking give me a minute......
Alright I got it. Brace yourselves, my eager fans, as we prepare to delve deep into the insanely, gut-wrenchingly controversial topic of: Putting sweet potatoes in a chulent. Or rather, doing so after having hijacked said chulent.
There is no doubt in my mind that this issue is a super-sensitive topic world-wide, and that what I am about to write will be affecting a large majority of the Jewish population of the world. Thereby meaning me and my brother, at least. Lately our Mom has been doing just that, sneaking large quantities of sweet potato into the chulent behind our backs, or when she thinks we don't notice. We don't eat the sweet potatoes, not in chulent at any rate. They are simply far to sweet (duh) and stringy. What's worse, they mush into the chulent so that every bite is filled with horrifically stringy chunks of orange goo.
Now of course we love our mother, and I would like to insert at this point that she bought me rollerblades and she rocks and is the most awesomest mom ever. BUT THE CHULENT, MOM! THE CHULENT!
I mean, it's not ruined, exactly, I wouldn't go so far as to say that. But if my brother is making the chulent, why shouldn't he be able to decide what goes into it, and more specifically, what doesn't? I think he should, anyway. So I guess the real problem is more in the area of chulent rights, not in the sweet potatoes themselves. I wouldn't want to deny Mom of her potatoes, and I think if she would ask nicely, even my brother would consent. But the grim truth that is being forced upon us here is that we have no control over our own chulent. And THAT thought, I think, should prove deeply disturbing to us all.
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17 comments:
Of course, I don't eat cholent anymore, but without the sweet potatoes, you have to go back to including my secret ingredient:
Ketchup.
Me, I make a mean Mexican Cholent, (black beans, corn, jalepenos, cumin, etc) and I prefer to use only sweet potatoes. But, I agree - the maker decides what goes in.
Oh, and I read you every so often. But you dont post so often. So it's really only mostly so often.
black beans, corn, jalepenos, cumin
Ai Carumba!
I'm not insulted. And I wholeheartedly agree with all you've written.
PT, what do you eat on Shabbat morning, if not cholent? Isn't it kind of necessary for Jews?
You'd think so, wouldn't you? Abba seems to have gotten in on this whole "health" craze. I think he's crazy. Chulent is the center of the Jewish world.
I've heard about these mexican chulents before, but never actually seen one. What do they look like? Do they taste like chille? (Or is that how the country is spelled?)
There should be a more universal chulent market, so that all jews have access to all sorts of exotic chulents at their leisure. I think it would bring our people together much more. But then, that's just me. I may be crazy.
I'm gentile. I don't know anything about chulent except that Jews eat it for Shabbat breakfast, and it appears to be somewhat like stew. So what does PT eat on Shabbat morning.
Shabbos breakfast! heaven forbid! I've never heard of someone eating chulent for breakfast! no, chulent is for lunch, or in extreme cases, friday night. Generally it's meat, potatoes, beans, barley, onions, and a whole lot of spices and other 'secret' ingredients that are really up to you. Different people make different types of chulents. Some are spicy, and i sometimes like those. My brother's is a more refined, unique flavor. His I like best.
Of course, chulent isn't just for jews. Gentiles can eat it too :). But i've always felt that chulents tastes best when eaten on shabbos, like it's meant to be. we call it, "a little shabbos spice".
So whaddya eat for shabbos breakfast, since you can't make anything? Are you allowed to spread something on a bagel, or pour milk on cereal?
bagels are fine, cereal's fine... not cooking doesn't mean you can't eat other stuff- it just means you can't change something's appearence by heating it. (Well, that's it vaugely anyway) Most people don't eat breakfast before shul, but i'musually lenient on shabbos, since my shul's service goes to, like, twelve :P.
No one reads your blog because it's stupid.
DENIAL OF HUMAN RIGHTS CANNOT BE ACCEPTED! CHULENT RIGHTS FOR ALL!!!
By the way, the sweet potatoe adds flavor, but it in itself doesn't taste so great.
You NEED to put beans in there. They change the taste completely.
I read you too . . . but I wouldn't be surprised if you denied my existence.
Tzipster- I'm glad you under stand.
Major Moron- SHUT UP.
Sweet potatoes are excellent additions: As long as you don't put in too many. Use mostly regular potatoes, and a couple of sweet ones. Otherwise, you end up with nasty mush.
And you are supposed to listen to your dad, unless he says to put in ketchup. This is a HUGE mistake. Ketchup burns easily, and ruins the flavor! (Okay, maybe a little is okay...)
Oh, this is all based on the expertise of my older brother, who does catering on the side. He made the WITS chulent for 5 years, back in the days when it was GOOD! I followed his recipe when I was the cook for summer zman (Allan went to Agudah Midwest), and a pot meant for 50 was eaten by 20. :)
psshhh psshhh- you may not know it, ezzie, but here at my little desk i am giving you a thumbs up. you cant see it tho, cuz ur not here.
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